August 7, 2024
After the viewing concluded, I sat down with Ms. Davis to finalize John’s funeral program. For some reason, I’m that person who always keeps a copy of the program from every funeral I attend. The obituary in the program contains family history which I think is always important to remember and pass down to the next generation. Funeral programs can be a family tree at your fingertips.
I guess that’s the reason why I always keep them.
Over the years, I’ve encountered a range of funeral programs, from elaborate ones featuring multiple 8″x10″ pages filled with pictures celebrating a life well lived, to simpler programs the size of a notecard with just a few heartfelt words. I decided that John’s program would lie somewhere between the two; the standard 5″x7″ double-sided four-page program which includes his obituary, the order of service, interment information, words of thanks, and a few pictures.
The first picture is more recent and shows the kindness in his eyes. What I want people to remember most about John is, he was a kind soul.
The next three pictures represent John’s proudest moments in life:
- His High School Graduation picture.
- The day he took the military oath of enlistment and the group photo with his family on that day.
- A picture of him with his proudest accomplishment of all; his daughter Kammy.
A most recent picture of John
John High School Graduation Photo
Military Oath Day
The Broken Chain is a poem I’ve seen in many funeral programs and I love it. This poem is a promise from God I truly believe in; death doesn’t separate us forever. I know it may be hard for people to think that, especially when you’re mourning the loss of a loved one, but this poem truly brings me great comfort. I want ‘The Broken Chain’ included in my funeral program and I let everyone know it.
It didn’t take long for me to realize I want to put it in John’s program too. Kammy will be able to look at this poem over the years and hopefully, it will comfort her as well. I wasn’t sure where the poem should be placed in the program, but when I looked at the picture of John, with Kammy nestled in his arms, I knew exactly where should go; right underneath that picture.
Ms. Davis thought it was a beautiful idea which made me feel good about the choice.
“I still can’t believe we’re here doing this,” I said, as a tear rolled down my cheek.
She gently rubbed my back as she handed me another tissue which only made me cry harder.
“I’m so sorry. I can’t imagine the pain you’re feeling right now”
“Thank you.”
She brought the conversation back to the program.
“We’ve completed the program so I’ll send it to the printer as soon as you leave. There’s a 5 pm deadline since the funeral is tomorrow morning and we’re cutting it close.”
“Check your email later tonight for the final copy”, she advised as she walked me to the door, “We want to make sure you see the final copy before the service tomorrow”
The Broken Chain
We little knew that day,
God was going to call your name.
In life, we loved you dearly,
In death, we do the same.
It broke our hearts to lose you,
You did not go alone.
For part of us went with you
The day God called you home.
You left us peaceful memories,
Your love is still our guide.
And though we cannot see you,
You are always by our side.
Our family chain is broken,
And nothing seems the same,
But as God calls us one by one,
The chain will link again.
Yes, my son, the chain will link again.
As we were driving back home from this very emotional experience, my phone rang.
It was my daughter Justice calling to say she overslept.
My sister-mom was right again. She usually is.
She asked how John looked.
“He looked very nice. They did a great job.”
She asked about the funeral tomorrow. I suggested she spend the night at our house and ride to the church with us. I didn’t want her to oversleep and miss the funeral tomorrow. She agreed and we arranged the pick-up time at 8 pm.
Among the many things I’ve learned from losing John so suddenly is, to always tell your children you love them. You never know when the last time you hear their voice will be.
So, before ending the call, I said, “I love you, Justice.”
And she replied, “I love you more, Mom.”
It’s been a very rough day and I really needed to hear that.