January 1, 2025
New Year.
For the first time ever, I’m leaving off the word ‘Happy’ in front of this salutation because I’m not. I’m still sad John isn’t here. I’m not going to mask my emotions by saying what everyone expects me to say today.
So, it’s just New Year.
I have no idea what this year will bring and to be honest, I’m somewhat fearful. I keep thinking, will it be as bad as last year? I’ve experienced death before but 2024, by far, was the worst one ever. There is nothing that can compare to the death of a child, especially when you lose your child to murder.
I take a deep breath, calm down and tell myself, “Stop thinking so negative, Shari. Let each day unfold, just like everyone else in the world has to do.”
My mother and sister-mom would tell me this. They would both be proud of me for saying it, and for listening to myself and acting on it.
The new year also brings the “R” word: resolutions. Common resolutions include eating healthier, losing weight, quitting smoking, spending more time with family, and managing stress. Interestingly, the second Friday in January is known as “Quitter’s Day,” as many people abandon their resolutions by this point. I find this both amusing and sad at the same time. In just ten short days, millions of people go from eagerly hitting the gym to walking right past it.
On December 17, 2024, I made an early New Year’s resolution that I intend to uphold not just in 2025, but for the rest of my life. This will be my year of turning pain into purpose, beginning with the Mothers of Murdered Columbus Children (MOMCC).
It’s heartbreaking that my son had to lose his life for me to find purpose in mine, but I am ready to move forward. I know it won’t be easy, but I genuinely believe that my hardest trials will lead to my greatest testimony.
The Journey Begins…
