August 6, 2024
It’s been ten days since John’s death, and I still can’t believe my son is gone.
This pain is unbearable. I’m broken in every conceivable way; mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually.
I told Sister Pam the only reason I’m still standing is because God is holding me up. He’s holding up what’s left of me so I can get through John’s funeral.
I’m mad, sad, confused, distraught and forlorn.
Why did this have to happen to my son?
Why?
I feel so guilty because I wasn’t there to save him.
He was such a kind and gentle soul. This is not the way John’s life was supposed to go. He was an innocent victim. A senseless act of gun violence took my son away from all who love him and robbed him of his future with his eight-year-old daughter.
I’ve always hated guns and now I hate them more than ever.
John should still be here!
As much as I want to crawl into bed, pull the covers over my head and cry all day and night, I know I can’t do that because now I have to fight. I have to fight for John. I have to fight for justice, and I’ll fight until justice has been served for my son.

GoFundMe Update
August 6, 2024
The one bright light in all this darkness is that we reached our GoFundMe goal just in the nick of time!
$10,917 was donated to the fund and another sweet angel made an offline donation to cover the remaining balance owed to the funeral home.
Let that sink in.
In less than one week, family and friends from all over the world heard our cry and answered our call by donating over $11,000.00 to lay our son to rest.
Unbelievable.
I’m moved to tears as I write this.
I’m so grateful for the outpouring of love and support.
I want to thank each and every one of you for your contribution, including my Moonwalker family.
As previously stated, I’m a lifelong Michael Jackson fan and have been from the moment I saw him perform with his brothers as the Jackson 5 on the Ed Sullivan show in 1969 when I was just five years old. I’ve met many MJ fans over the years and those of us who have a deep love and devotion to him are called Moonwalkers. My Moonwalkers circle branches out all over the world. When the Moonwalkers found out my son was murdered, many provided not only the emotional support I needed but also financial support by donating to the fund.
I feel so blessed.
Special Thank You to the Following:
My sister-mom, Cindy, for all you did in setting up and operating the GoFundMe account. I appreciate you more than words can say.
AJ aka andjustice4some on X (formally known as twitter). AJ is one of the most dedicated Michael Jackson advocates I know. Sadly, she also knows the pain of losing a child, so we share sisterhood in more ways than one. As soon as she found out what happened to John, she went into overdrive and began sharing the GoFundMe link far and wide.
My Moonwalkers Stationhead Family. You are truly amazing, and I appreciate all your L.O.V.E.
My Masterlife Sisters from First Church of God
Most of all, I thank God for holding me up and providing me the strength I need during this storm.
These amazing acts of kindness have shown me there’s still some good in this world.

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